Life on the Farm: Four-legged 1,200 lb. children

Life on the Farm: 1200 pound, four legged, black and white children

After growing up and working with cows most of my life, I have made one conclusion: cows are nothing more than 1200 pound, four-legged, black and white children. Every day, I find myself saying the same phrases she used on my brothers and I when we were younger. Some of these phrases include, “don’t eat that”, “what are you doing”, “no, you do not eat plastic”, “no, what part of no do you not understand?”, “why are you eating that?”, and so on and so forth.

Cows are mischievous creatures. They find trouble wherever they can. If a gate is left open for even one second, they barrel through it. If the gate to the parlor was not shut all the way, they know how to nose there way in to try to get extra grain from the feeders. A hole in the fence is an automatic escape for cows to find. They truly believe the grass is greener on the other side of the fence. I have had cows push other cows out of the way in order to get more grain or feed at the field rack. I have had cows block feeding areas and use their massive bodies to ensure none of the others can get to the feeding trough.

Sometimes, I will have a cow or calf that is sassy. They carry their large frames a certain way and will snort or throw their bodies when they feel neglected or insulted. For example, one time I told an old cow that she was a little thick and should cut back on the grain. She proceeded to snort in my face and turn abruptly so her rear end was in my face. Her tail then proceeded to come around and smack me across the face. Needless to say, the old girl did not appreciate my observations. Other times, I will put a calf in her pen after she escapes, and in retaliation, she will refuse to come near the gate at feeding. She will bawl and bawl, but she will not eat.

I also have some playful cows and calves. I have four or five calves right now that think it is funny to flip their grain bucket out of the holders in their houses. They do it every single feeding, but sometimes, the bucket handle gets stuck on their ears. Then the calves flail their heads around and freak out until one of us comes to the rescue. Some of my cows think it is funny to grab my hat while I am milking. Cows are very much aware that they stand taller than me. If I am not careful, I have a couple of cows that will reach into the parlor and rip my hat off my head. They will then hold it high in the air just out of reach. They are annoying and irritating, but funny when they are having fun. 

Cows are nothing more than 1200 lb, four-legged black and white children, but it makes life fun on Life on the Farm.

by Courtney Henderson